There's Nobody I Relate toI'm going to a small catholic college next year and was surfing through facebook and the people that were going to the same college. It seemed that they were totally different from what I am like.... How can I deal with them when I like to do different things socially?
First, I would say you are smart to try and get to know your classmates before you go to college - and your roommate too, when you know who that is. Of course, you know Facebook is only one way to find out about them. Of course, since I don't know exactly what kind of things they're into nor what you're into, and how different the two are, it's a little difficult to help you specifically. I do, however, think I can give you a little help generally, though. I wouldn't overblow the apparent differences between you and those whose facebook pages you've seen. Unless your profile tells the world everything there is to know about you, you should assume others' don't either. Don't you now have friends who aren't into everything you are? You can still be friends and have a great time together if you aren't both Jai Alai players (a random, hypothetical example...) I think you are likely to find more people with whom you will relate, than you believe to be the case right now. I'm not suggesting you will change drastically when you go to college, but I do think you should make sure to keep an open mind. And I'll bet you'll graduate from that school with a wider array of interests, and certainly experiences, than you would be able to predict right now. You'll probably find people with the same interests as you anyway. I also think you'll probably be able to convert some of your soon-to-be-classmates to enjoying some of the things you're into. But first, I think you should try some of their activities (with them) to see why they might like them. Too, here's what I'd do if I were you, and worried nobody at my future school liked to do anything I liked. 1. e-mail one or two of the future classmates on Facebook that seem otherwise similar to you (use geography, major, gender, other similar interests, etc.) and just e-mail them and try to get to know them. You don't have to write/talk specifically about the activities you are asking me about, just ask them why they chose that school, what their major is, what they're doing this summer, whatever you want to know. Then if it fits in the conversation, ask about those activities. If not, leave that question out and just see if they seem cool. 2. call (yes call, don't e-mail) your school and ask to talk to whomever is in charge of student life, student affairs, or student activities. Even if that isn't what they call it, they should know what you're talking about. Tell them you are trying to locate some other students who are into the same things as you. They should a. be able, and b. be willing to help you connect with like-minded students. The issue you've brought up, though: thinking you are the only person who BLANK's at your school, or a variation of that - being concerned you won't find anyone with whom you'll relate, is extremely common. Sometimes it's fear of the unknown, sometimes it's fear of the known! I'm sure there are plenty of good and important reasons you chose that school in the first place, and plenty of reasons you'll be happy there aside from what you've identified that appears to concern you. Of course, if we're talking about activities that are illegal, immoral, or otherwise bad (by either you or the others), all bets are off, and I'm not encouraging you to do anything like that. One more thing to think about... There is a SLIGHT chance you may have chosen the wrong school, or chosen the school for the wrong reasons. This feeling you're getting MIGHT be a sign you should look back at what caused you to select that school in the first place. I think the first explanation I gave is MUCH more likely, but didn't want to ignore another possibility. Back to Articles List |
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